Mayor Schmidt Decisively Takes Charge: 'We'll Look Into It'

You say you want a doggie park,
A place for dogs to run and bark,
And a chance to canoodle
With a cute little poodle?
Here’s what we’re gonna do:
“We’ll look into it.”

You say that the alley behind Zeytinia
Smells like a street in old Abyssinia?
You can stop all your moaning
And grumbling and phoning,
Here’s what we’re gonna do:
“We’ll look into it.”

You say your water’s brown?
Well, so do others here in town.
Instead of new mains
To get rid of the stains,
Here’s what we’re gonna do:
“We’ll look into it.”

Our parking lot’s a great place
For Olympic swimmers to race.
If your car’s wet inside
And you’re fit to be tied,
Here’s what we’re gonna do:
“We’ll look into it.”

You think your taxes are high?
And those sewer fees are a lie?
Then just you wait
‘Till next year in ’08,
Here’s what we’re gonna do:
“We’ll look into it.”

With empty storefronts galore,
Who would want to open a store?
Merchants let out a yelp
But the Mayor’s no help.
Here’s what we’re gonna do:
“We’ll look into it.”

You say that you want no zinc
In the Croton water you drink?
Don’t believe what we say,
Please just go away.
Here’s what we’re gonna do:
“We’ll look into it.”

Maria’s secret e-mails are a sham
And her advice not worth a damn.
I just hide them away
And to complainers I say,
Here’s what we’re gonna do:
“We’ll look into it.”

Verse by Croton’s Own Poet Laureate

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